Ahoy, Me Mates!!

After watching Pirates of the Carribean three times in a row, Little Man decided being a pirate isn't too bad of a way to earn a living. Learn some basic sailing skills, get an eye patch or a wooden leg, and find a parrot that only says "Pieces of eight, pieces of eight!" and you're set to go. With his mind made up he decided to hit the water and begin his pirate training. Of course, it was a little embarassing to have your mom come with you on your first pirate training adventure... but he needed a driver's license and some cash to rent a sea worthy vessel so he was forced to bring her along.

Partway through the training exercise, Connor was sure he spotted some buried treasure from an ancient shipwreck. With the price of gold these days he wasn't gonna hold back!

Murphy's Law teaches to always be ready for the unexpected. Here Little Man is simulating what he would do if the engine failed. No problemo, when you've got feet this fast and powerful.

Overall, it was a good experience (even with the parental units tagging along). Next time he goes out alone and under the cover of night.

Aboriginal Man

Recently, Little Man has learned how to decipher the intricate controls of the most important device ever invented- the TV remote control. With his newfound knowledge he quickly and easily chooses the programs he wants to watch, no matter what or who opposes him. It seems that he has taken a liking to the Natural Geographic channel. After viewing a program on Australia's aboriginal people we later found him like this...

It appears he has decided to give up his former life in an effort to become one with nature.

With his new identity and freedom, he is also able to explore previously unknown caverns.

He has also been sighted preparing weapons of war in case any neighboring tribes try to take over his territory.

These new tools also enhance his ability to locomote over difficult and uneven terrain.

With a few more back 'n' forth motions this stick will be as sharp and straight as an arrow.

After an extensive study of his surroundings along with his GPS-like brain, Connor is able to use his sensational navigation skills to determine which direction to proceed.

For his final show of force, Little Man shows how to best defend your territory when invaders are spotted. Using his pattented aerial ambush attack he surprises the enemy and unleashes a D-Day like assault against enemy positions.

Race Time

Connor decided recently that the whole walking thing was becoming too easy for him and he wanted to kick things up a notch. So he chose to enter into the Palmer 8K (5 mile) race just to see how everything would go. Being a race rookie he thought it best to bring along mom and pop so they could help give him pointers along the way. Clearly they are past their prime running years but perhaps they can give some moral support and share in their race wisdom.

Like most races, it started off easy enough...

...the aid stations were clearly lacking, only water or gatorade. C'mon, where's the chocolate milk?

Amazingly, Little Man finished the race in a little over 40 minutes without even breaking a sweat. His endurance is top notch for a beginner and I think it's safe to say that we'll be seeing more of him in the future.

Slammin Aarons' Super Slippin Slide Spectacular B-Day Party!!

This year I hit the big two seven. Kinda crazy, this whole gettin older bit. Once you get past 25 there aren't any more grown-up milestones to look forward to. So basically, birthdays are just an excuse to throw a party and eat lots of cake and icecream. And, really, I'm OK with that. Two years ago we had a BBQ and a pinata. Last year we had a BBQ and played kickball. This year, being my final B-Day in Iowa, I wanted to pull out all the stops and have some good ol' fashioned fun. So I decided to try out a 100 foot slip 'n' slide. Actually, the first one I bought was only 50 feet long... but it just didn't feel right so I had to take it back and get the 100 footer. And I'm glad I did. Here's some pics from the festivities. Enjoy...

Thanks to everyone who came and played. It was a blast!!

Even Super Heroes Aren't Immune

It's no secret that 2009 hasn't been a banner year for the economy. It seems like everywhere you turn there's evidence of the recession. The big questions everyone wants to know are- when will it end? how low will it go? and how do we recognize the bottom before everything turns around and goes back up? These are legitimate questions that can only be answered in hindsight. But if you want my opinion, I think we can't get any lower than this... For weeks there have been rumors flying around that even Superman has been forced to take a second job. Apparently, since the banks don't have any money left there aren't any criminals trying to break into those banks. Well, it was all just a rumor until these photos surfaced giving us concrete evidence that in fact, Superman has been forced into taking a second job at John Deere in an effort to supplement his income. Several attempts to contact Superman's agent have failed. Until he comes out in person to clear the air we can only guess why he chose John Deere. Maybe he got tired of the color red? Or perhaps he's using his laser vision to inscribe logos on all Deere machinery. We may never know the complete truth, but it's a sad day for us all.

Up, Up and Away!! (to work cuz my shift starts in 10 minutes!!)

Boys Will Be Boys

During this past week Little Man saw an older boy wearing a funny shirt and the following conversation took place:
"Dad, what kind of shirt is that, it looks funny?"
"That's a Boy Scout shirt. Don't make fun of it too much cuz someday you'll be wearing one along with the standard issue 1970s NBA length shorts."
"Cool, I like short shorts. They show off my massively powerful thighs and accentuate my robust backside. The ladies love it! But anyways, what do Boy Scouts do?
"Mostly play with knives and figure out how much gasoline and lighter fluid it takes to light a campfire without singeing your eyebrows off.
"Awesome!! I can hardly wait. Hey, maybe I should get a head start on those things now so later on I'll be an expert.
"Great idea son... I'll go find you some knives to play with. Just don't tell your mother, she wouldn't understand."

"Ooh... it's so shiny! I like it already.So what exactly do you do with these things anyways???

Take that you bad drawer, you'll never smash my fingers again!Hmmmmm... the more I hold this thing the more I feel a strange sensation coursing through my veins.

I'm becoming stronger and more ferocious with every second. I need more, MORE, MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Run for your lives!!!"

No More Tonka For Me

"Don't get me wrong... Tonka trucks are cool and all, but things are changing and life is diffferent for me now. For example, I'm now tall enough to see and reach for anything left around the perimeter of the kitchen table. It's a whole new world up on the kitchen table- and full of goodies that I never knew existed. Let's just face it, I'm over 14 months old and I'm not a little boy anymore. The other day I think I even got hit on by a 6th grader. 6th grade... now that's the big time! To go along with these changes I think I'm gonna need to upgrade my toys. No more plastic parts or made in China for me. I'm going for the big stuff, the whole enchilada! And fortunately, I know just where to find it. There's some construction going on nearby- the workers seem pretty lazy- so I doubt they'd even notice if something was missing. This one here...let's give it a try.

Not too bad but it seems a little tight inside the cab. I want to feel the warmth of the sun and enjoy the wind on my face.

Now this is what I'm talkin' bout!! Hurry, check and make sure no one's watchin.

... And away I go!!!!"

Mommy Issues

"Yesterday the kids at school told me that my mommy dresses me funny. At the time, I was shocked. No one had ever said this to me before. So I decided to check things out and see if there is any merit to this slanderous statement. I looked back through some recent pics and was more than surprised. Would my mother, the giver of life and my own flesh and blood, conspire against her first born son? In the end it was hard to argue against the evidence. Truly, its a sad day for all mankind. Looks like I'm gonna have to hire on a consultant or personal assistant of some kind just to protect my image. If the tabloids got ahold of these shots of me, I'd be ruined forever."

The Next Generation

Livin' the Big Life

"Check this out. I was surfing the web the other day and I found out about this thing called soccer. Apparently, it's a pretty popular sport in lots of small countries around the world with weird names I can hardly pronounce. But while I was watching it I thought to myself... this doesn't look too hard. I bet I can learn some of those moves and then get paid lots of money and perhaps even become a national hero for some strange unnamed country.


I prefer to practice mostly naked because it eliminates distractions and helps me to focus and concentrate better on maneuvering around difficult obstacles.

Who knows... maybe I'll get so good that I get to start my own team and they'll let me choose the mascot. If that's the case then I'll pick a tiger wearing a hat. Sure, there's a couple of sports teams named the Tigers, but mine is wearing a hat. It's a fresh idea and it's never been done before so I think people are really gonna go crazy over it.

But if it doesn't work out then I choose whatever type of bird this thing is. He kinda looks like Toucan Sam from the Fruit Loops box, don't ya think?

Of course our uniforms would have to be bright yellow. With any luck we'll be able to blind our opponents and as they try to shield their eyes then we'll drive in and score. It's a sure fire plan that can't miss!

Sometimes I get a little worked up before the games and they have to lock me in a cage. Look at the fire in those eyes!
You wanna piece of this?!?! BRING IT!!

After the game I like to go for a ride in my new sports car- just to relax and calm things down a little. Plus, I find an open top car like this helps the fans to recognize me as I drive by. I usually just flash a smile and a little wave and they get pretty excited about it. It makes people feel good... and that's what I'm all about. It feels good to give back to the fans.



Finally, before the night is done and over I like to sit back and relax in my custom made chair. Yeah, it's a little big... but that's how I roll!"

Chug, chug, chug!!!

"Life here in Iowa can be a bit... shall we say bland... so I like to liven things up by enjoying some of life's greatest treasures. After all, it's the Little Things that matter most!

When one encounters one of life's treasures it is important not to squander the opportunity. That's why I like the savor my A&W Rootbeer Float with as many senses as possible. The aroma is part of the experience.

Here's a little lesson I picked up from Chief Sitting Bull- never let anything go to waste. There are still precious droplets of yum-tacular flavor located inside that straw and I'm gonna enjoy every one of them.

MMMMmmmmmmmm.... boy was that good! Who's ready for round two?"

Watch Out Martha Stewart

In seasons of tough economic times, such as we are now facing, most people want to pull back or run for safe shelter until the situation stabilizes. It's best to hunker down and wait until the storm is over, right? Wrong! At least that's what Little Man says. He has assured us that now is the time to be moving forward, to gain territory while others are retreating. There is no surrender or waiting it out, only pressing forward at full steam ahead.
The first step is to identify an open niche and then figure out how to exploit it. After much careful consideration Connor has figured it out. He has found his cash cow and is ready to start milking it for all its worth. The world of manners and niceties is a female dominated world... but not for much longer. Little Man plans to enter this open niche to bring some much needed testosterone to balance everything out. "Connor the Manners Man" is daring to go where no man has dared go before. Below is a sneak peak at the first video in his upcoming series due to be released next month.

Worlds Strongest Baby Competition

Recently we've noticed some new behaviors that Connor seems to be acquiring. At first we were unsure of where these new skills were coming from, but after racking our brains we figured it out. Little Man has been staying up late a lot and watching TV. And of course in the twilight hours of the night there's nothing to watch on TV except for infomercials and the old 1970's World's Strongest Man Competitions on ESPN 2.

Perhaps his nickname of Little Man is making him a little self conscious- but Connor really seems to have taken a liking to the World's Strongest Man competitions. It's all he babbles about all day long. He even went online and found out that BALCO is sponsoring a World's Strongest Baby competition with the winner getting free "juice" until he turns 18. Of course that's quite the incentive so Little Man has already begun his training regimen and he now prefers to be called Magnus Ver Magnussconnor. So far his favorite event to train for is the atlas stone. In fact, hot off the press from Buff Baby magazine are some pictures from a few of his recent training sessions.
A good approach is crucial to a successful lift. Notice the focus in his eyes and the concentration on his face. This is a preparatory step to unleashing the fire within.In this one Magnus Ver Magnussconnor demonstrates the proper grip technique and back alignment. Since babies are made of rubber it is best to bend the spine as much as possible, much like bending a spring, so it can quickly snap back with ultimate force.This may only be a training session but that atlas stone weighs 37 kilos (392 pounds). Contestants must keep the atlas stone elevated above their head until the judge signals a complete lift. It's a grueling task at best, and one suited only for professionals.